Here are some tips for talking to your kids about divorce.
Divorce is never easy, and it’s particularly challenging for parents of young children. In addition to worrying about the legal issues of child custody, parenting time, and child support, there is the very personal consideration of how the children will handle the divorce emotionally.
Unfortunately, as much as you want to spare your children, you can’t make your divorce completely free of pain and stress for them. Fortunately, how you communicate with them before, during, and after the divorce can help them navigate this challenging time and develop remarkable resilience and a good relationship with both parents. Here are some tips for talking to your kids about divorce.
Break the News Carefully
When you tell your children about your upcoming divorce, you will probably have made your peace with the idea. However, the news will likely rock their world, even if it’s not a surprise. Break the news with your spouse so you can reassure the kids of your love for them and answer their questions together.
Choose a quiet, private place and leave plenty of time for questions. A weekend morning or early afternoon is best, so that children won’t have to go to school or bed with the news still fresh in their minds.
Listen, Don’t Talk
Your mission is to establish a communication channel with your kids about this critical issue. To do that, you will need to know what they’re thinking and feeling. When talking to kids about divorce, it’s important to let them know that you want to hear their questions and what they’re feeling, even if they’re angry at you.
Keep it Simple
You may be tempted to give your kids much information, but resist the temptation. This is big news and will take time to absorb, so stick to the basics. Don’t overwhelm your kids with explanations they didn’t ask for and may not understand. Again, be open to questions; they will tell you what they need to know. Don’t go into lengthy detail about a parenting schedule, especially with young kids. Give them information closer to the time they’ll need it.
Maintain a Routine
Having similar routines at both homes can be comforting, especially for younger children. You may want duplicates of favorite books, toys, and comfort items, so there is always one wherever the children are. Some families even have the family pet travel back and forth with the children, which can be enormously comforting. When talking to your children about moving back and forth between homes, it will be soothing to remind them that they will have the same bedtime routine at their other home and verbally walk through it with them.
The Right Lawyer Can Make All the Difference
Hiring a lawyer should be the first thing you do when encountering any legal matter, not a last resort. Whether you’re thinking about a separation or divorce or have been charged with a crime, been injured in an accident, or your civil rights have been violated, you need to first know your rights. Contact Mike Mastracci today at 614 Edmondson Ave Catonsville, MD 21228 (with satellite offices in Ocean City, Snow Hill, and Salisbury, Maryland), 410-869-3400, and check us out on Facebook.